It has been a long time since my last entry. I’ve been very busy, teaching and just starting a research project with mothers of children born of wartime rape. I think I want from having too little to do to having too much to do.
The teaching went well, once I adapted ot the culture and the language. I’ve learned that students won’t ask questions directly but if I put them together in small groups to discuss things and then go around the room speaking the the groups, the group will ask a question. Perhaps this is the collective culture working, perhaps they are moral and social support for each other. In any event it works. On the other side I must say that the students who ask questions ask incredibly good questions, better than any of my graduate students ask, even though they are only undergraduates with limited English. Some of them are amazingly smart.
I also am planning to cooperate with Dr. Vincent in setting up research projects with students. There are two issues that seem to arise spontaneously: how to understand and prevent intergenerational transmission of trauma, and how to understand and promote Rwanda resilience. Every one from the West says that Rwanda is a traumatized culture, and there is a lot of trauma, clearly, but there also is a lot of strength. They have recovered from the genocide, and are seen in many quarters as a model for East Africa. The Kagame government goal is to turn Rwanda into an information based economy, and the people are certainly smart enough to do it.
Even so, I wonder about political and social issues. Rwanda is a conflict avoidant society now, and for obvious reasons. Decisions are reached by consensus rather than debate, and there is no real concept of a loyal opposition. I’m told by white people in the NUR administration that their workers will never say they don’t know, and will never ask questions or challenge. They just nod their heads in agreement with authority, and don’t do what they are supposed to because they don’t understand. I don’t think this contributes to the corporate efficiency that the government wants, and will have to be dealt with, somehow. This will be a culture change, or at least a subculture change.
A political story on the same point that I was told by a white colleague who teaches at NUR.. When Europe intervened in Libya the first reaction of the Rwandan students was outrage when it was first announced, and they were vocal about it.. It was another instance of Western imperialism in Africa. But a few days later Kagame came out in favor of the intervention (seen as opposing genocide) and the students who had spoken out were terrified about being seen as traitors by the government. There was no retaliation, of course, but the anxiety was very real. I’ve seen it in my students as well, when they have to disagree with the chairman.
All in all, I’m in the middle of a fascinating social experiment, and I’m pleased to be here except when I miss my NY life, which is for a few moments every day, at least for now.
Sunday, September 25, 2011
Sunday, September 4, 2011
Sunday, September 4, 2011
It has again been along time since I posted. I would say that I have been very busy, but that doesn't do justice to my use of time. I alternate between periods of being very busy with periods of having nothing to do, or being too tired to do anything. I didn't realize just how much coping was called for to do this. But a lot as happened.
I have planned the training for the students. It has gradually evolved to a two week training with about 60 students, at all levels. I will be examining the theory and the therapy of psychological trauma. It will be a shortened version of my YU course. There are problems. The first is English. We are mandated to teach in English but the student's english is not very good. I think the university is ignoring the problem, or making claims that simply aren't true about the student's capacity. My plan is to have some students helping with translation and break the students into small groups about 2/3 through the lecture so that the ones who speak english can explain what I said to the students who don't. We'll see.
At a more practical level, many of the students can't afford notebooks or pens. I agreed to pay for them, or rather let my fulbright money pay for them. I don't mind, but I again wonder what this says about the possible quality of the learning. Again, we'll see. I do what I can.
I've also made a good connection with two students and am planning to supervise their BAC 4 (senion) this. Isiah is one of the smartest students I have had. He would be smart anywhere but he is particularly remarkable in Rwanda. He independently realized the problem of children born of wartime rape, and conceptualized it as an identity issue. I think he is the future of psychology in Rwanda. Fabien is more complex. He is from a rich farming family that lost everything in the genocide, and very driven. He learned english working as a security guard and managed to find benefactors. His english is quite good, and he sounds likehe was educated in England, although he is self taught. He has a german girlfriend who he plans to marry. He hopes to study abroad, possibly in the Netherlands or the US, and possibly move out of the country. At first I found him grating but as I got to know his history I became more sympathetic. He wants do do work on coping, resilience, and post-traumatic growth in Rwanda, and this is an important topic. I don't think that he is the future of psychology in Rwanda, although he may be a leader in the Rwandan diaspora.
Psychologically I'm OK, although still strained. My biggest problem is not knowing anybody. There isn't much of an expat community, not that I would necessarily want it, and the expat community that does exist seems to be francophone. Sometimes I go to the Ibis and just sit to be surrounded by white faces, even if I can't understand what they are saying. Hopefully, I will get to know more people when the semester starts, in early october I think. The academic calendar seems to be somewhat of a secret.
I have planned the training for the students. It has gradually evolved to a two week training with about 60 students, at all levels. I will be examining the theory and the therapy of psychological trauma. It will be a shortened version of my YU course. There are problems. The first is English. We are mandated to teach in English but the student's english is not very good. I think the university is ignoring the problem, or making claims that simply aren't true about the student's capacity. My plan is to have some students helping with translation and break the students into small groups about 2/3 through the lecture so that the ones who speak english can explain what I said to the students who don't. We'll see.
At a more practical level, many of the students can't afford notebooks or pens. I agreed to pay for them, or rather let my fulbright money pay for them. I don't mind, but I again wonder what this says about the possible quality of the learning. Again, we'll see. I do what I can.
I've also made a good connection with two students and am planning to supervise their BAC 4 (senion) this. Isiah is one of the smartest students I have had. He would be smart anywhere but he is particularly remarkable in Rwanda. He independently realized the problem of children born of wartime rape, and conceptualized it as an identity issue. I think he is the future of psychology in Rwanda. Fabien is more complex. He is from a rich farming family that lost everything in the genocide, and very driven. He learned english working as a security guard and managed to find benefactors. His english is quite good, and he sounds likehe was educated in England, although he is self taught. He has a german girlfriend who he plans to marry. He hopes to study abroad, possibly in the Netherlands or the US, and possibly move out of the country. At first I found him grating but as I got to know his history I became more sympathetic. He wants do do work on coping, resilience, and post-traumatic growth in Rwanda, and this is an important topic. I don't think that he is the future of psychology in Rwanda, although he may be a leader in the Rwandan diaspora.
Psychologically I'm OK, although still strained. My biggest problem is not knowing anybody. There isn't much of an expat community, not that I would necessarily want it, and the expat community that does exist seems to be francophone. Sometimes I go to the Ibis and just sit to be surrounded by white faces, even if I can't understand what they are saying. Hopefully, I will get to know more people when the semester starts, in early october I think. The academic calendar seems to be somewhat of a secret.
Monday, August 15, 2011
MONDAY, August 15, 2011
A long time since my last post. I have been so busy and so exhausted and so flooded that I've done what I have had to do during the day, and then just collapsed at night.
So just to update everybody:
I've settled in Butare in a very nice room at the Hotel Credo, and have made some contact with the university, particularly the student organization, who are starving for connection with the outside world. I've agreed to do a trauma training for them: one week at the end of the semester, another week at the beginning of the new semester. I have also asked my students to correspond with them, which they also very much appreciate. But none of this quite captures who they are and what they need. So two brief vignettes
I talked about a two week training after the semester is over. It wouldn't work because they have to go back home to their villages. If they stay at the university they would have to pay for their food, which they can't afford. It costs them 100 rwandan francs a day to eat. That is about $1.80. What Sheila and I spend on a meal would feed them for a week.
Another anecdote. I met with them in a group to discuss our plans. They don't run groups the way we do. In American groups everybody vociferously asserts their position on the issue under discussion. Here they listen to what each other says, and deliberately add to it. Language such as: I would add to what you say that ...., or in case of disgreement... "Let me answer you." I get a sense of what a communcal culture is like and how it functions.
The work on disclosure with Foundation Rwanda is underway, not quickly - nothing happens quickly - but Jules and Jonathan are committed to raising money for it, and the students here are eager to participate.
I'm slowly learning kindyarwanda. Slowly doesn't capture the difficulty. People will tell me words and I just can't remember them for 5 minutes. The grammar is different also - nouns and verbs pack a lot of information into them that we would put separately, and there are 16 noun cases. But I don't have to write poetry in kinyaranda, only manage to say a few things. I speak to everyone in my kinyarwanda such as it is, and they correct me. I think it changes the power dynamic a bit.
Sheila is here now. We have come back to Kigali so she can see the city, and will move to Butare at the end of the week. It is good to have her here; it it feels like home, although i sometimes am aware that she will leave.
we're going to the genocide museum today. that should be .. an experience.
So just to update everybody:
I've settled in Butare in a very nice room at the Hotel Credo, and have made some contact with the university, particularly the student organization, who are starving for connection with the outside world. I've agreed to do a trauma training for them: one week at the end of the semester, another week at the beginning of the new semester. I have also asked my students to correspond with them, which they also very much appreciate. But none of this quite captures who they are and what they need. So two brief vignettes
I talked about a two week training after the semester is over. It wouldn't work because they have to go back home to their villages. If they stay at the university they would have to pay for their food, which they can't afford. It costs them 100 rwandan francs a day to eat. That is about $1.80. What Sheila and I spend on a meal would feed them for a week.
Another anecdote. I met with them in a group to discuss our plans. They don't run groups the way we do. In American groups everybody vociferously asserts their position on the issue under discussion. Here they listen to what each other says, and deliberately add to it. Language such as: I would add to what you say that ...., or in case of disgreement... "Let me answer you." I get a sense of what a communcal culture is like and how it functions.
The work on disclosure with Foundation Rwanda is underway, not quickly - nothing happens quickly - but Jules and Jonathan are committed to raising money for it, and the students here are eager to participate.
I'm slowly learning kindyarwanda. Slowly doesn't capture the difficulty. People will tell me words and I just can't remember them for 5 minutes. The grammar is different also - nouns and verbs pack a lot of information into them that we would put separately, and there are 16 noun cases. But I don't have to write poetry in kinyaranda, only manage to say a few things. I speak to everyone in my kinyarwanda such as it is, and they correct me. I think it changes the power dynamic a bit.
Sheila is here now. We have come back to Kigali so she can see the city, and will move to Butare at the end of the week. It is good to have her here; it it feels like home, although i sometimes am aware that she will leave.
we're going to the genocide museum today. that should be .. an experience.
Sunday, July 31, 2011
Sunday, July 31, 2011
It has been a while since my last post. I have been very busy, and have alternated between productive activity and total exhaustion. I do take a one hour walk every day which keeps me relatively sane, or at least handles my anxiety.
Academically i have had an amazingly productive time. Here is the list, just in case anyone is interested.
I met with Jules, David Russell, Gabo Wilson, Jude Sezimana (a rwandan sociologist). We are going to run focus groups to investigate how mothers and children deal with the fact that the child was born of rape. The aim is to develop "interventions" to help everyone manage this better. If all goes well we will get some pilot data which we can use to get substantial funding. And this is a real social problem throughout Africa and other conflict areas.
I met with Anastase Shyaka who is the executive secretary of the Rwanda Governance Advisory Council. He and I both are really interested in the connection between trauma and democracy. To summarize a long discussion, we think that functional democracy requires a functional social fabric, and it is the latter that is disrupted by trauma. Shyaka wants to think about this more, write papers, etc. The usual academic stuff. He invited me to a conference they will be holding dealing with issues of governance. This is really the big picture intellectual stuff that interests me.
However, probably my real development and change is coming from the stories I hear and the conversations I hav, as I wander around asking questions while trying to learn kinyarwanda. Here are a few, not too much context, just the idea.
Robert,my driver when eric isn't around, when he was 14 fell in love with a girl. She was from a good family, the daughter of a minister, and went to an exclusive private school where only english was spoken. The school was outside of Kigali, and Robert needed money to visit her. So he sold a belt his mother had given him to get the money. Without a belt he had to put a string around his waist to hold his pants up, but at least he had the money to go see his young love, which he did. Unfortunately he spoke almost no english at that time. So when he got there everyone was speaking good english except him. He came out with some confused sentences which everyone laughed at. His girlfriend was humiliated and told him not to come back. He didn't see her again, although he keeps track of her location.
Another conversation. Eric told me that he gets angry at the people who have been in Rwanda a long time and make no effort to learn Kinyarwanda. This includes american embassy people, americans and europeans who work in NGO's or American run businesses He says that if we Rwandans make an effort to learn their language, why don't they make an effort to learn ours.
On the other hand, before we get too much into an anticolonialist mood there is this story. Sylvia, who did some translation for me says she doesn't like to work in Rwandan businesses because everybody gets paid the same, independent of effort. When pushed they say: why should I work hard, it isn't my father's company. She likes the Ugandan work ethic, where everyone works hard. I didn't say american I said ugandan, although I think Uganda is influenced by globalization more, at this point.
I finally learned to cope with the little boys who follow me around wanting money. Usually they begin by saying hello in english and then start asking me questions. I managed to say "Oya" (no) and then raruchereho (please stop), and they actually stopped. I most have fooled them into thinking i know more than I do.
The best questions asked of me here were by a rwanda sociologist and his boss. they were: what do you have to offer us, and if you cure people of trauma and they don't have jobs or money, won't they do right back to being traumatized. I do have answers of a sort, but they are academic, and I'll note write them down. The point is that these are good questions, good marxist questions. My answer isn't: i will help you organize and liberate yourself however. More to follow
Academically i have had an amazingly productive time. Here is the list, just in case anyone is interested.
I met with Jules, David Russell, Gabo Wilson, Jude Sezimana (a rwandan sociologist). We are going to run focus groups to investigate how mothers and children deal with the fact that the child was born of rape. The aim is to develop "interventions" to help everyone manage this better. If all goes well we will get some pilot data which we can use to get substantial funding. And this is a real social problem throughout Africa and other conflict areas.
I met with Anastase Shyaka who is the executive secretary of the Rwanda Governance Advisory Council. He and I both are really interested in the connection between trauma and democracy. To summarize a long discussion, we think that functional democracy requires a functional social fabric, and it is the latter that is disrupted by trauma. Shyaka wants to think about this more, write papers, etc. The usual academic stuff. He invited me to a conference they will be holding dealing with issues of governance. This is really the big picture intellectual stuff that interests me.
However, probably my real development and change is coming from the stories I hear and the conversations I hav, as I wander around asking questions while trying to learn kinyarwanda. Here are a few, not too much context, just the idea.
Robert,my driver when eric isn't around, when he was 14 fell in love with a girl. She was from a good family, the daughter of a minister, and went to an exclusive private school where only english was spoken. The school was outside of Kigali, and Robert needed money to visit her. So he sold a belt his mother had given him to get the money. Without a belt he had to put a string around his waist to hold his pants up, but at least he had the money to go see his young love, which he did. Unfortunately he spoke almost no english at that time. So when he got there everyone was speaking good english except him. He came out with some confused sentences which everyone laughed at. His girlfriend was humiliated and told him not to come back. He didn't see her again, although he keeps track of her location.
Another conversation. Eric told me that he gets angry at the people who have been in Rwanda a long time and make no effort to learn Kinyarwanda. This includes american embassy people, americans and europeans who work in NGO's or American run businesses He says that if we Rwandans make an effort to learn their language, why don't they make an effort to learn ours.
On the other hand, before we get too much into an anticolonialist mood there is this story. Sylvia, who did some translation for me says she doesn't like to work in Rwandan businesses because everybody gets paid the same, independent of effort. When pushed they say: why should I work hard, it isn't my father's company. She likes the Ugandan work ethic, where everyone works hard. I didn't say american I said ugandan, although I think Uganda is influenced by globalization more, at this point.
I finally learned to cope with the little boys who follow me around wanting money. Usually they begin by saying hello in english and then start asking me questions. I managed to say "Oya" (no) and then raruchereho (please stop), and they actually stopped. I most have fooled them into thinking i know more than I do.
The best questions asked of me here were by a rwanda sociologist and his boss. they were: what do you have to offer us, and if you cure people of trauma and they don't have jobs or money, won't they do right back to being traumatized. I do have answers of a sort, but they are academic, and I'll note write them down. The point is that these are good questions, good marxist questions. My answer isn't: i will help you organize and liberate yourself however. More to follow
Saturday, July 23, 2011
July 23, 2011
I've been in Kigali a week now. I would say it seems like yesterday but actually it seems like forever, or better, that I am in a different time zone and/or life altogether. The only thing that reminds me of my previous reality is email and phone calls with Sheila.
As I say, a lot has happened. Academically and Professionally things are going well. I had a very good meeting with a british/african group who wants to set up a facility for a target group of Rwandan University Students. These are Rwanda men and women who are in college and have no families because everyone was killed during the genocide. When other students go home they have nowhere to go and are likely to be depressed, anxious, all the usual stuff but particularly important in a family oriented culture. they are at risk for poor performance, dropping out, and marginalization. I've been asked to run a focus group for them which I'll do on monday, and update everyone.
Also academically I had a good meeting with Anastase Shyaka who is the executive secretary of the Rwandan Governance advisory council. I met him through Sam Totten and earler through Dennis Sandole. We talked, naturally about good governance in Rwanda, and how collective trauma affects this. We formulated an idea that: functional democratic government is dependent on a functional social fabric, and the social fabric was severely damaged by the genocide and still is, year later. He invited me to a conference and asked me if I would write a paper for a journal the RGAC publishes. I said yes, of course, being an academic. I hope it happens.
In fact, I hope all of these promised things happen. I have learned to trust god but tie my camel.
Personally, I alternate between being excited that I'm here and wishing I had never come. Sometimes within a ten minute period, and often triggered by something. As a negative trigger, a Rwandan women approached me during my walk, spoked to me in what I regarded as a forward fashion, sometimes in English and sometimes in my minimal kinyarwanda. "Hello, my name is Betty." she said, and loudly, forcefully. "Where are you staying?" I've learned Rwandan tricks so I said in a hotel. "Which hotel" I told here "the hotel down the road" and fortunately there are several. I didn't want her showing up at the hotel. My first thought was that she was a prostitute but I learned that there is a Rwandan practice called detoothing where college girls get an older sugar daddy which may or may not involve sex, but certainly involves exchanging the presence of an attractive young woman for money and favors. In any event, I walked away and she didn't follow me. That left me very shaken.
On the other hand, a Rwandan man carrying a hammer, a laborer, walked by me and said "Amakuru (how are things going)" When I replied nimeza (good) he gave me a thumbs up. I do have to say, however, that I get nervous when I see men carrying agricultural implements.
I've met lots of people here: Several missionaries, Mormon and Salvation army; Indian businessmen invited by the ministry of finance; Contract military people training the Rwandan army, a Rwandan mental health counselor, and probably others I don't remember. There's not one Rwandan culture, I think, but lots of them, existing side by side and occasionally bumping into each other. The sociologist Ulf Harrmez calls it "habitats of meaning," a term which I just read which seems to fit.
I do this by just walking up to people and asking who they are, risking humiliation to acquire knowledge. The only real humiliation I had with this was walking to the table of german conference attendees who told me who they were, very reluctantly asked me who I was, and signalled nonverbally that I should go away, which I did. It also helps with some hotel people waiters, etc, that I am learning kinywrwanda, which I am although very very slowly.
As I say, a lot has happened. Academically and Professionally things are going well. I had a very good meeting with a british/african group who wants to set up a facility for a target group of Rwandan University Students. These are Rwanda men and women who are in college and have no families because everyone was killed during the genocide. When other students go home they have nowhere to go and are likely to be depressed, anxious, all the usual stuff but particularly important in a family oriented culture. they are at risk for poor performance, dropping out, and marginalization. I've been asked to run a focus group for them which I'll do on monday, and update everyone.
Also academically I had a good meeting with Anastase Shyaka who is the executive secretary of the Rwandan Governance advisory council. I met him through Sam Totten and earler through Dennis Sandole. We talked, naturally about good governance in Rwanda, and how collective trauma affects this. We formulated an idea that: functional democratic government is dependent on a functional social fabric, and the social fabric was severely damaged by the genocide and still is, year later. He invited me to a conference and asked me if I would write a paper for a journal the RGAC publishes. I said yes, of course, being an academic. I hope it happens.
In fact, I hope all of these promised things happen. I have learned to trust god but tie my camel.
Personally, I alternate between being excited that I'm here and wishing I had never come. Sometimes within a ten minute period, and often triggered by something. As a negative trigger, a Rwandan women approached me during my walk, spoked to me in what I regarded as a forward fashion, sometimes in English and sometimes in my minimal kinyarwanda. "Hello, my name is Betty." she said, and loudly, forcefully. "Where are you staying?" I've learned Rwandan tricks so I said in a hotel. "Which hotel" I told here "the hotel down the road" and fortunately there are several. I didn't want her showing up at the hotel. My first thought was that she was a prostitute but I learned that there is a Rwandan practice called detoothing where college girls get an older sugar daddy which may or may not involve sex, but certainly involves exchanging the presence of an attractive young woman for money and favors. In any event, I walked away and she didn't follow me. That left me very shaken.
On the other hand, a Rwandan man carrying a hammer, a laborer, walked by me and said "Amakuru (how are things going)" When I replied nimeza (good) he gave me a thumbs up. I do have to say, however, that I get nervous when I see men carrying agricultural implements.
I've met lots of people here: Several missionaries, Mormon and Salvation army; Indian businessmen invited by the ministry of finance; Contract military people training the Rwandan army, a Rwandan mental health counselor, and probably others I don't remember. There's not one Rwandan culture, I think, but lots of them, existing side by side and occasionally bumping into each other. The sociologist Ulf Harrmez calls it "habitats of meaning," a term which I just read which seems to fit.
I do this by just walking up to people and asking who they are, risking humiliation to acquire knowledge. The only real humiliation I had with this was walking to the table of german conference attendees who told me who they were, very reluctantly asked me who I was, and signalled nonverbally that I should go away, which I did. It also helps with some hotel people waiters, etc, that I am learning kinywrwanda, which I am although very very slowly.
Monday, July 18, 2011
Monday, July 16, 2011
A brief update on the past few days, and some cultural thoughts.
Psychologically, I feel like an infant almost, totally deskilled, and dependent on other people for everything. I don't even know the basics like how to get a phone card, or where anything is, or how to get around, or what is safe and what isn't. I insisted that eric teach me how to buy a phone card, rather than get it for me. How much worse it must be for immigrants, particularly poor ones, who are in my position but without power and privilege, and more at stake.
Sunday i want to church, following up my afternoon with the men. I found the service, it was a Catholic service quite moving. Although it was in french, and i only got the gist which seemed to be that you could die at any time, so you had better relate to jesus. That was not the moving part. The moving part was the solemnity of it all, the significance for the people. I remember one very tall very somber black man, dressed in a dark suit, staring ahead at something serious that I couldn't see, and then going up to stand in a line to receive communion. I was one of two mezungos there (white people) but there was a time to shake hands with your neighors and every one shook hands with me.
But before I get too idyllic I do have to say that there were more women and children there than men. Eric says the men stay home, living virtue and piety to the women. This is a generalization; not all men do this. And afterwards when we were in the car getting ready to drive off, a beggar knocked on the car window, wanting money which I guess he thought was better solicited after church.
I applied for my visa today and it went smoothly which is to say that only a few things went wrong. The big problem was the price of application. Eugenie said it was 50,000 rwandan francs, which is what i was prepared to pay. The sign on the wall, which eric noticed, and the visa officer confirmed, was 100,000 francs, and i was supposed to go back and pay more. However, it turned out, maybe that I didn't have to pay anything because there is an understanding between the national university and immigration that visiting scholars aren't charged for the visa. But maybe this is incorrect. In any event they have my passport which they will keep until this is staightened out, and i end up paying something or nothing. I'm beginning to not take this personally, at least not too long, and tell myself this is just the way it is.
One more cultural note. Rwanda as a culture of suspicion. The norm is that you don't talk about the details of your life, because in some way they may be used against you. Eric says a good friend is someone who won't do this, and sometimes friends are better than family. An example of suspicion: sometimes a caller will ask the person calling their location, and the person being called won't be specific but will say something like "I don't know exactly." It makes it hard to make arrangments. And sometimes people play tricks. The caller will be in the same place as the callee, and the caller will ask the person if they are free. The callee might say something like: I'm sick and can't go out, and the caller will say: but i see you three tables away.
I don't think we should idealize communal societies. Perhaps the culture of suspicion - the examples aren't always humorous - went into the making of the genocide.
Psychologically, I feel like an infant almost, totally deskilled, and dependent on other people for everything. I don't even know the basics like how to get a phone card, or where anything is, or how to get around, or what is safe and what isn't. I insisted that eric teach me how to buy a phone card, rather than get it for me. How much worse it must be for immigrants, particularly poor ones, who are in my position but without power and privilege, and more at stake.
Sunday i want to church, following up my afternoon with the men. I found the service, it was a Catholic service quite moving. Although it was in french, and i only got the gist which seemed to be that you could die at any time, so you had better relate to jesus. That was not the moving part. The moving part was the solemnity of it all, the significance for the people. I remember one very tall very somber black man, dressed in a dark suit, staring ahead at something serious that I couldn't see, and then going up to stand in a line to receive communion. I was one of two mezungos there (white people) but there was a time to shake hands with your neighors and every one shook hands with me.
But before I get too idyllic I do have to say that there were more women and children there than men. Eric says the men stay home, living virtue and piety to the women. This is a generalization; not all men do this. And afterwards when we were in the car getting ready to drive off, a beggar knocked on the car window, wanting money which I guess he thought was better solicited after church.
I applied for my visa today and it went smoothly which is to say that only a few things went wrong. The big problem was the price of application. Eugenie said it was 50,000 rwandan francs, which is what i was prepared to pay. The sign on the wall, which eric noticed, and the visa officer confirmed, was 100,000 francs, and i was supposed to go back and pay more. However, it turned out, maybe that I didn't have to pay anything because there is an understanding between the national university and immigration that visiting scholars aren't charged for the visa. But maybe this is incorrect. In any event they have my passport which they will keep until this is staightened out, and i end up paying something or nothing. I'm beginning to not take this personally, at least not too long, and tell myself this is just the way it is.
One more cultural note. Rwanda as a culture of suspicion. The norm is that you don't talk about the details of your life, because in some way they may be used against you. Eric says a good friend is someone who won't do this, and sometimes friends are better than family. An example of suspicion: sometimes a caller will ask the person calling their location, and the person being called won't be specific but will say something like "I don't know exactly." It makes it hard to make arrangments. And sometimes people play tricks. The caller will be in the same place as the callee, and the caller will ask the person if they are free. The callee might say something like: I'm sick and can't go out, and the caller will say: but i see you three tables away.
I don't think we should idealize communal societies. Perhaps the culture of suspicion - the examples aren't always humorous - went into the making of the genocide.
Saturday, July 16, 2011
July 16, 2011
Its saturday and i've been in kigali for two days now.
Friday I was exhausted and just settled in. I did have two intersting conversations, exhausted or not. The first one was with a man who was training the rwandan army so that they would be prepared when they go to sudan. He was with a military team and they were training the army in what sounded like organizational stuff. He'd met kagame and a lot of the people in the history books, and was impressed by their efficiency and relative incorruptibility. He is a southerner and from a military background, clearly. He'd actually done trainings in many of the world's trouble spots, including cambodia, so we had a lot to talk about. Two different sides of the same phenomenon. It was a good and interesting talk despite the fact that he hated obama and still was angry at the north for the civil war. Did I say that he was from georgia?
The other was with a sociologist turned marketing consultant, who had worked with a medical group that did abortions for women raped during the genocide It was hard, he said, because the church opposed it. Another interesting man.
Today I got TIGO working, the modem, with some help from eric who has a friend who is a computer expert. It wouldn't have been apppropriate to pay him, so I offered to take the friend, and another friend, both of whom are eric's best friends, out to lunch. They took me to a real rwandan hangout, a small place on a side street on a dusty steet, where they knew the owner. The restaurant did have an inner court, but they pulled out a table and chairs and were served outside. Another group of Rwandan men were also there. Various friends of eric's came by and we just sat around and talked and drank beer and ate brochettes. Actually they talked, occasionally explaining to me what was going on in English. They seemed to alternate between kinyarwandan and french. I could occasionally follow the frencn and a word or two in kinyarwandan.
The content doesn't matter, though. What matters is that this is what men do on saturday, hand out and drink beer and talk and joke. They say that their wives are at home, and are glad that the men are with each other instead of getting in trouble with other women. Sunday the whole family goes to church. The wives will have cooked and taken care of the children on saturday. Louise, if you are reading this, I'm learning about the Rwandan gender system. One woman came by and sat down briefly. She knew some of the men having worked with them on aid projects. As it happened when she learned that I was a psychologist she asked me to tell her about herself. I did what the magicians call a blind reading: I told her that she was an ambitious woman but had a great deal of anxiety. She reluctantly acknowledged the ambition, but totally agreed about her anxiety. She worried about the future all of the time; what would happen to her, what would happen to her children, could they afford the university, etc. She is married to a german man and was going back there to live. When eric and the rest heard that she was worried about the future they said she wasn't african any more. According to them, africans live in the present.
Some thoughts for later:
the rwandan culture of distrust and strategic communication
the rwandan love of children
village versus city
Eric is what the literature calls a hybrid, and louise and i have called a creole. He says explicitly that the replaces what is bad in his culture with what he learns that is good from other cultures. He does this consciously, and in fact learned how to do it. I think they all are hybrids. They were sitting around in a traditional fashion, but they all had cellphones, which rang continually. The restaurant was playing American music.
Friday I was exhausted and just settled in. I did have two intersting conversations, exhausted or not. The first one was with a man who was training the rwandan army so that they would be prepared when they go to sudan. He was with a military team and they were training the army in what sounded like organizational stuff. He'd met kagame and a lot of the people in the history books, and was impressed by their efficiency and relative incorruptibility. He is a southerner and from a military background, clearly. He'd actually done trainings in many of the world's trouble spots, including cambodia, so we had a lot to talk about. Two different sides of the same phenomenon. It was a good and interesting talk despite the fact that he hated obama and still was angry at the north for the civil war. Did I say that he was from georgia?
The other was with a sociologist turned marketing consultant, who had worked with a medical group that did abortions for women raped during the genocide It was hard, he said, because the church opposed it. Another interesting man.
Today I got TIGO working, the modem, with some help from eric who has a friend who is a computer expert. It wouldn't have been apppropriate to pay him, so I offered to take the friend, and another friend, both of whom are eric's best friends, out to lunch. They took me to a real rwandan hangout, a small place on a side street on a dusty steet, where they knew the owner. The restaurant did have an inner court, but they pulled out a table and chairs and were served outside. Another group of Rwandan men were also there. Various friends of eric's came by and we just sat around and talked and drank beer and ate brochettes. Actually they talked, occasionally explaining to me what was going on in English. They seemed to alternate between kinyarwandan and french. I could occasionally follow the frencn and a word or two in kinyarwandan.
The content doesn't matter, though. What matters is that this is what men do on saturday, hand out and drink beer and talk and joke. They say that their wives are at home, and are glad that the men are with each other instead of getting in trouble with other women. Sunday the whole family goes to church. The wives will have cooked and taken care of the children on saturday. Louise, if you are reading this, I'm learning about the Rwandan gender system. One woman came by and sat down briefly. She knew some of the men having worked with them on aid projects. As it happened when she learned that I was a psychologist she asked me to tell her about herself. I did what the magicians call a blind reading: I told her that she was an ambitious woman but had a great deal of anxiety. She reluctantly acknowledged the ambition, but totally agreed about her anxiety. She worried about the future all of the time; what would happen to her, what would happen to her children, could they afford the university, etc. She is married to a german man and was going back there to live. When eric and the rest heard that she was worried about the future they said she wasn't african any more. According to them, africans live in the present.
Some thoughts for later:
the rwandan culture of distrust and strategic communication
the rwandan love of children
village versus city
Eric is what the literature calls a hybrid, and louise and i have called a creole. He says explicitly that the replaces what is bad in his culture with what he learns that is good from other cultures. He does this consciously, and in fact learned how to do it. I think they all are hybrids. They were sitting around in a traditional fashion, but they all had cellphones, which rang continually. The restaurant was playing American music.
Wednesday, July 13, 2011
July 13, 2011
This is the day I'm leaving. Right now Sheila and I are doing the last minute packing. The final step will be to pack up my computer, which will mean that I am really going to be someplace else. How much the computer anchors me in cyberspace; we are already cyborgs and just haven't heard the news.
People think of this as a great adventure, and perhaps it is. My experience though isn't of adventure, if adventure means lions and tigers and shoot ups and facing bad guys. The basic skill involved in this seems to be list making and long term planning and negotiating things that don't work. List-making as a martial art.
Everybody asks me how I feel. I tell them I am excited and nervous. They tell me that is appropriate. After a while though it feels like we are reading from the same script. The subtext is more like: I can't believe that I got myself into this, or Perhaps I could go to San Franscisco for the duration of the Fulbright and just tell people i went to Rwanda. I've said that to people too, and they laugh, as if I'm joking. I'm not joking, or at least not too much.
Really the hardest part of it all will be missing Sheila. We haven't been separated for this long since we got together. For two "distancers" we have become very attached. Well, it is a growth experience, and has taught us how much we mean to each other. "you never miss your water till the well runs dry," as the country song has it.
Next week in kigali.
People think of this as a great adventure, and perhaps it is. My experience though isn't of adventure, if adventure means lions and tigers and shoot ups and facing bad guys. The basic skill involved in this seems to be list making and long term planning and negotiating things that don't work. List-making as a martial art.
Everybody asks me how I feel. I tell them I am excited and nervous. They tell me that is appropriate. After a while though it feels like we are reading from the same script. The subtext is more like: I can't believe that I got myself into this, or Perhaps I could go to San Franscisco for the duration of the Fulbright and just tell people i went to Rwanda. I've said that to people too, and they laugh, as if I'm joking. I'm not joking, or at least not too much.
Really the hardest part of it all will be missing Sheila. We haven't been separated for this long since we got together. For two "distancers" we have become very attached. Well, it is a growth experience, and has taught us how much we mean to each other. "you never miss your water till the well runs dry," as the country song has it.
Next week in kigali.
Thursday, July 7, 2011
July 7, 2011
I'm just getting ready to leave. Only a few more days. I'm anxious and excited, anxious about being away so long; excited about being in Rwanda and doing the work.
Vincent Sezibera has sent out an official notice about my arrival, and I'm pasting it below. Having an official notice is like seeing an article or a poem in print; it makes it real.
Dear Dean,
I’m pleased to announce that the Department of Clinical Psychology is welcoming and hosting a Fulbright US Scholar from July 15, 2011 through end December 2011, Prof. Carl Auerbach. He arrives Kigali July 14, 2011.
Prof. Carl Auerbach, Ph.D. is a Professor of Psychology at the Ferkauf Graduate School of Yeshiva University, New York, US. He is the co-director, with Dr. Louise Silverstein, of the Yeshiva University Fatherhood Project, and the director of the Program in Holocaust and Genocide Studies in the Program of Clinical Psychology. At the University he teaches courses in Psychology of Trauma, Qualitative Research Methodology, History and Systems of Psychology, and Self Psychology. In addition to his teaching activities, he supervises graduate students research and does clinical supervision. Dr. Auerbach received his B.A. in Physics at Reed College in 1963, and his PhD in Psychology from the University of Pennsylvania in 1968.
Prof. Auerbach’s research interest is in the psychology of trauma with a particular emphasis on collective trauma, and he has published extensively in these areas. In addition to his publication of research articles he is the co-author of a textbook in qualitative research methodology, and a textbook in Psychological Statistics.
Prof. Auerbach looks forward to a long term collaboration with the National University of Rwanda, and learning from the faculty and students at the National University of Rwanda, particularly the Department of Clinical Psychology.
At the Department, Prof. Auerbach will contibute to the following academic activities, not limited to :
- - Teachings (undergraduate and post-graduates programmes) : Advanced Psychopathology (Traumas and outcomes), Research methodology : Qualitative methods, Further issues in Psychotherapy
- Research : Joint Projects development and funding, Seminars on Trauma and Resilience
- Curriculum development : Advice on existing teaching programmes and develop new ones : Clinical Neuropsychology and Forensic Psychology
- Mentorish : Syllabus versus Module based teachings, MsC and PhD students supervision
- Twining the Department of Clinical Psychology with US sisters institutions developing the above mentioned programmes.
Being a prestigious academic position from the Fulbright Fellowship, the department is delighted to host the honored guest and senior scholar, Prof. Carl Auerbach. Therefore, would you join the department in welcoming the Fulbrighter.
Kind regards,
Vincent
Fulbright Scholar
Vincent Sezibera has sent out an official notice about my arrival, and I'm pasting it below. Having an official notice is like seeing an article or a poem in print; it makes it real.
Dear Dean,
I’m pleased to announce that the Department of Clinical Psychology is welcoming and hosting a Fulbright US Scholar from July 15, 2011 through end December 2011, Prof. Carl Auerbach. He arrives Kigali July 14, 2011.
Prof. Carl Auerbach, Ph.D. is a Professor of Psychology at the Ferkauf Graduate School of Yeshiva University, New York, US. He is the co-director, with Dr. Louise Silverstein, of the Yeshiva University Fatherhood Project, and the director of the Program in Holocaust and Genocide Studies in the Program of Clinical Psychology. At the University he teaches courses in Psychology of Trauma, Qualitative Research Methodology, History and Systems of Psychology, and Self Psychology. In addition to his teaching activities, he supervises graduate students research and does clinical supervision. Dr. Auerbach received his B.A. in Physics at Reed College in 1963, and his PhD in Psychology from the University of Pennsylvania in 1968.
Prof. Auerbach’s research interest is in the psychology of trauma with a particular emphasis on collective trauma, and he has published extensively in these areas. In addition to his publication of research articles he is the co-author of a textbook in qualitative research methodology, and a textbook in Psychological Statistics.
Prof. Auerbach looks forward to a long term collaboration with the National University of Rwanda, and learning from the faculty and students at the National University of Rwanda, particularly the Department of Clinical Psychology.
At the Department, Prof. Auerbach will contibute to the following academic activities, not limited to :
- - Teachings (undergraduate and post-graduates programmes) : Advanced Psychopathology (Traumas and outcomes), Research methodology : Qualitative methods, Further issues in Psychotherapy
- Research : Joint Projects development and funding, Seminars on Trauma and Resilience
- Curriculum development : Advice on existing teaching programmes and develop new ones : Clinical Neuropsychology and Forensic Psychology
- Mentorish : Syllabus versus Module based teachings, MsC and PhD students supervision
- Twining the Department of Clinical Psychology with US sisters institutions developing the above mentioned programmes.
Being a prestigious academic position from the Fulbright Fellowship, the department is delighted to host the honored guest and senior scholar, Prof. Carl Auerbach. Therefore, would you join the department in welcoming the Fulbrighter.
Kind regards,
Vincent
Fulbright Scholar
Monday, June 27, 2011
June 27, 2011
I just got back from the Fulbright pre-departure orientation. I learned a lot, already, and I'm not even in Rwanda. Here are two of the insights:
1. the 3 P's: persistence, patience, politeness. These are the virtues that are called for for things to work out for the Fulbright. Another way they put it is to treat all of your plans as hypotheses to be tested. They probably will be at least partially falsified, so have a plan B, C, D, and etc.
2. Deep culture. This is a new concept for me. The concept is distinct from surface culture, what we usually see. The surface culture is things like food, dress, names, language, dance, holidays etc, to list a few at random. It is largely conscious, they say, and easy to observe. Below surface culture is deep culture with two levels: cultural rules, and then cultural assumptions. These are more or less unconscious and very emotionally laden. For example, a deep culture rule is that when you meet somebody on the street you can't just say hello and walk past them. You have to have a fairly long conversation in which you inquire about each others welfare in detail, make a certain amount of small talk, and then depart, wishing each other well. It should take at least 15 minutes. If you don't do it people will get angry at you, and consider you uncivilized. (I've heard stories about this.) The assumption behind this is, I think, that everybody is always connected and that the relationship at the moment is more important than any business type activity. Very unamerican, sensible in some ways, but no one could do it here.
More to follow. My schedule is still a bit up in the air, as the Rwandan government just changed the start of the semester from September to October. I was told that flexibility matters, and that plans are hypotheses, and I'm already seeing that in operation.
1. the 3 P's: persistence, patience, politeness. These are the virtues that are called for for things to work out for the Fulbright. Another way they put it is to treat all of your plans as hypotheses to be tested. They probably will be at least partially falsified, so have a plan B, C, D, and etc.
2. Deep culture. This is a new concept for me. The concept is distinct from surface culture, what we usually see. The surface culture is things like food, dress, names, language, dance, holidays etc, to list a few at random. It is largely conscious, they say, and easy to observe. Below surface culture is deep culture with two levels: cultural rules, and then cultural assumptions. These are more or less unconscious and very emotionally laden. For example, a deep culture rule is that when you meet somebody on the street you can't just say hello and walk past them. You have to have a fairly long conversation in which you inquire about each others welfare in detail, make a certain amount of small talk, and then depart, wishing each other well. It should take at least 15 minutes. If you don't do it people will get angry at you, and consider you uncivilized. (I've heard stories about this.) The assumption behind this is, I think, that everybody is always connected and that the relationship at the moment is more important than any business type activity. Very unamerican, sensible in some ways, but no one could do it here.
More to follow. My schedule is still a bit up in the air, as the Rwandan government just changed the start of the semester from September to October. I was told that flexibility matters, and that plans are hypotheses, and I'm already seeing that in operation.
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